Today I was in Walgreens picking out a card for my sisters birthday and I happened across the Father’s Day cards. I haven’t had a father in my life for about four years now and so I tried to make a joke about it, took a picture of the cards and sent a picture to my other fatherless friends. But should I really make fatherlessness a joke? Think I have a different perspective of being fatherless than most because at one point my dad was my world I was a daddy’s girl and then I just wasn’t. I think fathers dad should shine light on how many kids can’t celebrate this holiday. That’s how I feel. Peace.

Should love hold me back?

Should love hold me back? I have only ever felt average. I’m the girl who was always decent but not good cross country, basketball, track, academics. Average looking. Average personality. But I am growing. I am changing. My future is big I can feel it. I will not accept anything less then my goals. Then why am I letting love hold me back? ” I have the oppurtunity to do an internship in New York!” ” If I want to make it big I can’t stay here.” NO. NO. NO. He will not have it. I want him to be proud of what I am in the process of and will accomplish. But instead it’s about his safety bubble his comfort zone. But I love him. Can I ask him to change who he is to benefit me and what I want? Am I being unfair? Is he not who I hope he is. My future husband, my best friend, my future lover, and my babies father? I have goals and ambition. I have been stuck average for far to long. I know what I want and I can accomplish it. But should love hold me back?

Technology is the spawn of the evil one. That’s an ironic statement considering I’m laying here with my MacBook on my lap and my iPhone 5C beside me but I have an old soul & like many of those who are physically aged I’m beginning to realize technology is ruining us. I’m socially unintelligent. My twitter is my personality. My feelings are posts online. There is no beauty in life anymore unless you find beauty in a screen. If I could break the chains that keep me prisoner to the online world I would see the beauty in a smile or a touch. The importance of a moment. The world is open and accepting of my love. If only I could get off the phone to hear it calling me asking me to be apart.